Rambling Post #12: The Final Hurdle.

So here I am.
Sat in my University canteen for what is most likely the last time, eating a sandwich and writing this as an attempt to get my brain to reset before my final ever exam.
It literally feels like yesterday I was on my way to my induction at Everyman cinema back in September 2013, and was handed free coffee on Briggate. Little did I know that the next 4 years were going to be the most unpredictable and rollercoaster-like so far.

There's a lot of things i've experienced but also overcome during my time at Leeds Beckett.
I made friends, I lost them, I got drunk, I made more friends, I split with my long-term boyfriend, Leeds Metropolitan University changed to Leeds Beckett University, I went on a placement year, I moved to Australia, I attended Victoria University, I made more friends, I went on adventures, I got drunk, I came back, I moved house, I got drunk, I got asked to be my good friend's bridesmaid, I was diagnosed and came to terms with anxiety, and as cheesy as it sounds, learnt a lot about myself on the way.

Couldn't have done it without you guys.

Out of everything though, the biggest lesson i've learned during these 4 years is that first impressions really aren't everything. I have been so wrong about a lot of people, and learned to give people a chance, they may surprise you.
Sometimes I look back to the person I was before I came to University and I don't recognise myself. One of my friends, Mary, was telling me only the other day how much i've changed since then.
I'm not usually a massive advocate for change, but this one is good.
I feel somewhat closer to adulthood (don't get me wrong, i'm still miles off).

As it all comes to an end, on one hand, I can't bloody wait. No more stress, no more deadlines hanging over my head and no more watching Netflix wracked with guilt. But on the other hand, I am going to miss it. It's weird thinking I won't be a student anymore and that I need to start looking like i'm getting my life together (so society dictates).

Who knows, I may be back one day. But for now, peace out Beckett.
Annabel

February.

Finally back to a proper monthly round up. It's always nice to look back on these and remember everything that I was up to.
This month I had my final first day at University. This summer i'll be graduating (hopefully) and that's the scariest thought i've ever had. A lot of my free time was spent on a hot date with my dissertation, writing towards my goal of 10,000 words of complete and utter bollocks.

Kiri is one of the closest friends I met whilst I was in Australia, and luckily enough, she only lives 2 streets away from me here in Leeds. We've been meaning to meet up for ages but we've been busy, and when we talked about it we figured that we'd been putting it off as we didn't know if things would still be the same now we're not in that amazing country any more. We couldn't have been more wrong. We had an amazing catch up and talked for hours. Both of us needed to be up super early in the morning so we agreed to "have a few drinks" and aim to leave Box at 11pm. This did not happen. At 3am we were sat in a girl's room that we had met that night (she wasn't a weirdo she was lovely), when Kiri turned to me and said, "Annabel, we definitely need to go to bed now". Miraculously, I still made my 9am lecture and Kiri made it to work. A nap was needed.

One of my most favourite things not just in February but like ever was seeing Green Day at Leeds First Direct Arena. I really don't know what to say now because I can't put into words how amazing they were. Billie-Joe Armstrong was the most entertaining artist I have ever seen, and he was so natural and genuine with it. The performance the group gave was amazing and I really hope I get the chance to see them again. I pretty much just spent the night screaming with my sister, Emma and cousin, Natasha. (Shout out to Posicle Riley & Uncle Simon for getting the tickets and taking us).

Best. Gig. Ever.

For Em's Christmas present, I surprised her with tickets to go see Jack Whitehall, and finally the day came! He was hilarious, I laughed so much my cheeks hurt. I've been to see a few comedians before but it was a first for Emma, who thought it was really weird sitting down in Leeds Arena.

I honestly had the best Valentines Day. I spent the evening with Kiri, Peree, Harriet and my Mum. I'd just won my stone and a half award at Slimming World so I felt like celebrating (we ate, A LOT, of shit*). There was Daim ice cream, cookie dough, melted chocolate, pizza, Walkers Sensations, wine... But we had a lovely night in with my Mum telling the girls embarrassing stories about me, watching TV and laughing at various memories when we'd consecutively go; "do you remember when..." or "remember that time...". All in all, it was a great night, however I ate nothing but vegetables for the few days that followed!

I feel like this month it would have made more sense if i'd just moved into Leeds Arena. This time it was to see Kings of Leon, a band i've loved for years. Jordan, Harriet (both cousins), Emma (sister) and I went and they were absolutely awesome.

My dissertation deadline is next month...i'm not freaking out yet but there is still time.

Annabel

Slimming World update: Got my Stone and a half & Club 10 awards this month, 1st 11lb lost in total.

*not literal shit...

Rambling Post #11: What Do I Do Next?

I'm pretty sure 99% of Undergraduates experience this, but right now, i'm a little freaked out. Graduating from University always seemed like something that was far away and it was something that 'Future Annabel' would have to deal with, not me. But now i've started my final semester at Uni and it's all starting to get a little real.
So what do I do next?

Samuel L. Jackson memes are always relevant.

Obviously the usual thing to do after graduation is find a full-time job and become a proper adult.
No.
Not for me.
Not yet.

Don't get me wrong, I can't wait to have a proper job and get earning more money so I can get my own car and maybe a flat. However I get the feeling that as soon as I get a full-time job, i'll get comfortable and forget to do other things that maybe when i'm older i'll wish I had done whilst I had the chance. My problem is, I just don't know what order to do them all in.

24 weeks to Graduation.

So there's Camp America, travelling the South-East, save up and get myself a car, summer working at Disneyworld, Masters Degree? (still unsure about this one), volunteering abroad, move out...
I know this is totally a first-world problem kind of thing but it's been stressing me out and I suppose it's always easier for me to write things down to make sense of them.
I suppose the logical way to go forward would be to get the majority of the travelling and volunteering done, then go for a Masters if I decide it's something that i'd want to do. Then I suppose it will finally be time for a graduate job and to get my own little flat.
This is the first time in my life where I don't really know what's going to happen next, and whilst it's quite exciting with endless possibilities, i'm used to having a plan and a structure and knowing what to expect, so it's a little scary.

For now I guess I just need to focus on graduating.

Annabel

January.

Happy New Year!
So here's a fresh new year before us, I wonder what it will bring? Fingers crossed it brings everyone success and happiness. For me, 2017 will bring my graduation, a trip to Canada to visit my sister from another mister Priya, my 23rd birthday (it freaked me out the first time I said that), and being a Bridesmaid for one of my close friends, Rachel.

Now this is quite possibly the shortest monthly round up I've ever done and hopefully will ever do. In all honesty i've been quite busy this month but i've been too occupied with enjoying it to take any pictures or to remember to write about it, so i'm just going to do a few bullet points.

• I recovered from NYE just about (I actually fell up some stairs that night and really hurt my knee - I couldn't walk properly for a few days!
• I gave my cousin her birthday present, which is tickets to the Harry Potter Studio Tour.
• Did non-stop work for Uni because it seems like deadlines are coming out of every orifice.
• Mum and I started shopping for bits and bobs for the room swap (I can't wait to completely redecorate).
• I actually needed to take a dyslexia test at Uni, but i'm all clear.
• Us Bridesmaids went to Rachel's house to sort more things out for the wedding but we ended up just ordering a takeaway and watching Bridesmaids.
• Viv and I went to see Passengers at the cinema and very much enjoyed Chris Pratt's derriere. 
• Mum's Christmas present was tickets to go to the Emmerdale Tour at ITV Studios, so we had a grand day out along with lunch at TGI Fridays (and lots of cocktails).
• On the same day it was my work Christmas do. We went for food at Akbar's and the food was great, but I was stuffed beyond belief. We then went for some drinks afterwards, then I made my way to the cinema.
• Because I was now meeting Megan and Charlotte to see the final episode of Sherlock at Vue. It was amazing. Ben C is bae and Hudders is the Queen of sass.
• I got drunk with my work friends. Again.
• My sister had GymFest performing at Leeds First Direct Arena. Like what?! I just saw my sister on the same stage that i've seen Bastille, Lee Evans and McBusted, and will see Green Day, Kings of Leon and Russell Howard on. It's just so bloomin' cool.
• I moved back up to my Uni house for my final semester EVER.
• The final event of January was going to see Two Door Cinema Club at Leeds O2 Academy for the 4th time. They were brilliant.

So really I just wanted to enjoy January and make the most of what was going on after a busy Christmas, which is also why I didn't write a December round up. But hopefully February will be more exciting!

A quick update on Slimming World, i've now lost a grand total of 1st 5.5lbs. Feeling pretty chuffed with myself to say the least.

Annabel

A Letter To My Younger Self.

A company called Earnest is encouraging people like me to share advice I would have for myself back when I started University. It's fair to say i've been through a lot between the ages of 19 and 22, and whilst I don't think 'wise' is a word that would ever be used to describe myself, I know i'm definitely wiser. I don't have any regrets, and wouldn't change any decisions I have ever made, but i'd love to go back in time to just give myself some reassurance.

Me, Anya & Emma, on holiday in Mallorca, a few weeks before I started 1st Year.

So if I could write a letter to my 19 year old self, what would it say?

Dear Pre-University Me,
Get ready. Because you're about to enter the weirdest and most roller-coaster-ish 4 years of your life, and you won't even recognise yourself at the end of it (that's a good thing).

You're going to meet a hell of a lot of new people, but remember, you're all in this stress-inducing experience together. You'll meet people that are nice, mean, judgy, helpful, kind, funny, annoying, intelligent... But the most important thing to remember, and something you're going to struggle with for the next few years is just to be yourself, who cares what anyone else thinks. You're going to get judged whether you like it or not, so at least let it be whilst you're enjoying yourself.

Remember that everyone is different. No one is the same. You won't find another human being who treats you exactly how you treat others, so if someone's a little frosty or maybe a little over-enthusiastic; cut them some slack. They're not you.

Make the most of absolutely everything. Even the rubbish bits. Embracing the rubbish bits make you appreciate the great bits. And making the most of the great bits just goes without saying. Nothing lasts forever so appreciate what you have whilst you've got it.

STOP SPENDING YOUR MONEY. Somehow I don't think you're ever going to get a handle on this, but you can at least try. Learn to budget. Stop spending your money on food and stupid stuff you'll like for a week then forget about.

And for gods sake, don't leave assignments to the day before. There's nothing worse than getting a stress on when you've done an all nighter and you're hyped up on coffee with 600 out of 2,000 words done. Just learn to manage your time better and stop having Netflix marathons.

Annabel

Earnest's student loan refinancing page is a great resource for information on paying off loans and financing for University!

Rambling Post #11: Thoughts On Starting 3rd Year.

Well. It's finally here. Out of my entire 17 years of education, this is the one most likely to give me a mental breakdown. The way I look at it is, i've never really properly worked my ass off at Uni, 6th Form or school, so I kinda feel like I owe it to myself (and future Annabel) to just for once put everything into my education. I mean i'd like to come out with a First, but looking at my track record that's doubtful, but that's still what i'll be aiming for.
It's only been 2 weeks and I already feel like i'm drowning a bit with all of the work and the extra reading and researching for my dissertation and writing my proposal, then on top of that I need to go to all of my classes and get a good nights sleep (and fit in catching up on my favourite TV series') and make sure I eat healthy and go to work and socialise (get drunk) and revise for exams and do some exercise and for some reason someone somewhere believes that this isn't at all too much to do.
I know my first semester is probably going to be the hardest, so i've just got to smash out these next few months and after a few meltdowns I should be able to get through it. Then once my dissertation's handed in in March I only have 2 exams to study for.
Whoever said 6th Form is more difficult than University was a filthy liar.
Rant over!
Annabel

September.

Here it is! 3rd year! I can't believe that i've only got 1 year of education left. Thank god for that. After 17 years of non-stop learning (apart from my "Gap Yah"), it's finally the beginning of the end.

Maybe the biggest thing that happened for me in September was moving into my new house for 3rd year into Headingley. This will make it so much easier to make those early lectures and i'm just excited to live in a house with all girls. Unfortunately because none of us really thought to arrange it earlier, we need to go the first 2 and a half weeks without WIFI or a working TV. I'll be doing a room tour just like the one I did in Aus soon.

A benefit of working for LEGO means you get a free Merlin pass for yourself and another, which means free entry to anything Merlin (Alton Towers, Sealife, Thorpe Park, Legoland...). So my sister and I went for a day out in Manchester where we collected our passes from the LEGO Discovery Centre in Trafford, then went through the attraction and decided to visit Sealife next door too. We then went for a bit of a shop (I actually started my Christmas shopping), which was when Em spotted Michelle Keegan and Mark Wright in Selfridges. Which is really depressing because she had no make up on and she still looked stunning.

Walking around Trafford.

We also had another work get together which went the usual way: getting completely smashed. I don't remember falling asleep, but apparently I crashed pretty early and just wouldn't wake up. Oops.

I decided to get a group picture before the alcohol began to flow...

Towards the end of September I went to London with Viv from work, and we went to see Harry Potter and the Cursed Child in the Palace Theatre (which coincidentally is on Shaftesbury Avenue, where Harry, Ron & Hermione apparate to in the Deathly Hallows Pt1). No spoilers here, but what I will say is that it was quite possibly the best live experience of my life. I loved it. The way they do the magic on stage is so so clever. We stayed overnight in an AirBNB near Kings Cross and on the day after we wanted to put our Merlin Passes to good use. We went on the London Eye which is something i've been wanting to do for ages - that's now ticked off my Bucket List!. We also visited the London Dungeons and went for a quick walk around London Sealife. Total ticket prices for that day: £0. Winner winner chicken dinner. We then made our way to the coach for our 4 hour journey home.

INSANE. Go see it. NOW.

And of course, i'm now officially in 3rd year. The stress is real, and I already want to pull my hair out. Graduation can not come quick enough!

September was actually a great month as far as gig tickets go. I managed to score Green Day, Russell Howard, Two Door Cinema Club and one more that I can't tell you about yet... They're all in the beginning of next year and i'm so so so excited.
Annabel

July & August.

Well first of all, apologies for going a bit AWOL for 2 months. After getting back to England I wanted to take a little break from my blog and make the most of being back at home with my family and friends and in all honesty, I kind of forgot for most of it! I'm just going to bring you quickly up to speed with what i've been up to before I start my 3rd year of University.

July was pretty much just a lot of homecomings, a lot of alcohol but also a lot of staying at home because I was hella poor.  It was so great to get to see all my friends again, i'd missed them so much!
There was a couple of surprises, one being me surprising my class at dancing;

And my sister also surprised me at the airport. I'm not going to show you that video because 1. it's too long, 2. I look minging because i've just gone 24 hours sat in the same seat without a shower and 3. I cried.
The big one was an afternoon at my house where various family members and friends came over for the day and my Mum put on a glorious buffet. There was a lot of alcohol and a big game of Cards Against Humanity so i'm just going to leave that one there. Then the next few days included a few sleepovers and days out with friends.

So August!
It was pretty much mostly me settling back in at work and earning some dolla again. However August is host to the best day of the year; my birthday. It was a pretty quiet one compared to my previous birthdays. 22 sort of marks the beginning of no more exciting birthdays. It literally is downhill after 21. Through the day we just chilled out at home and I got to Skype Priya and Tarrena which was awesome. In the evening my cousin was having her hen do (3 years belated, because she couldn't stop having babies), so we all went for drinks at the usual spots, Wetherspoons, Revolution, Yates'. Later on, me and Harriet wandered up to Propaganda, where I used to work, to finish the night off.

On the 20th I went to join my family in Spain, where they had already been for a week. The weather was gorgeous, it was in the low 30's for the majority of the week. One day we went to the beach and me, my sister, my three cousins and my auntie went Parasailing, which is something we have all been wanting to do for a while.

Just hanging around off the Costa del Sol.

So September should start to pick up with me actually having money to do stuff now and with University starting. I'll be moving into my new student house soon so there will be posts about that and Freshers Week so i'll be posting more frequently in a few weeks!
𝕒𝕟𝕟𝕒𝕓𝕖𝕝

Aussie Room Tour.

So until now I moved here i've never lived on my own, which was a big leap when I decided that the first time I would move out would be to the other side of the world. My friends and family have been nagging me for pictures of my room and I suppose doing this post would be a good way to remember it after i've left as well.

Little panorama shot of the main part of my room. Behind me is the kitchen and bathroom.

So i'm in a little studio apartment near to my University campus, which is a bonus when I have to be up for a 9am lecture (which still rarely happens but don't tell Mum). I love having my own little kitchen. I'm no where near Jamie Oliver but i'm trying to start to learn how to cook more things. 2 months in and i'm still a bit rubbish (I set fire to spaghetti last month) but i'll get there eventually!

Smallest chopping board ever.

Definitely my favourite thing about my room is having a balcony. I don't really spend a lot of time on it, I just love the fact that I have one. When it gets to around 3/4pm the sun is in the right position for me to do a bit of sunbathing!

The view from my balcony.

My second favourite feature in my room is my tapestry. One of my friends from back home (Tom, who's blog you can read here) has one and I loved it so much I decided to copy him like I always do. And I also have a slight obsession with elephants at the moment.

Probably the only time my bed has been made all semester.

And of course, here's the must-have photo wall filled with all of my favourite people. There are a few photos that have been added after living here such as the Harbour Bridge group photo and me chilling with a Koala.

My collection of photos - most of them of friends and family back home with some additions from Australia!

Next to my photo mirror I have my mini scratch maps stuck up. These came in a Travel Journal that I bought from Waterstones in the UK. I have a full scratch map at home but these mini ones are perfect to take with you and i'll probably stick them up in my student house when I get back to Leeds too.

Also with my Harbour Bridge certificate!

The bathroom is pretty standard with a small shower, loo and basin. It was a bit dull when I first moved in so I brightened it up a bit with a nice shade of bright pink. I also have a washer/dryer, but I don't use the dryer part as i'm terrified i'll accidentally shrink my clothes. Hanging my clothes on the balcony dries fast enough anyway.

My exciting bathroom!

My desk has the usual stuff, TV, DVD Player, notebooks, reading books, pens, DVD's etc.

My desk: mostly used for procrastination.

So there's my lovely first little flat! Unfortunately I don't have long left in it now. Soon it will be time to start packing it all away and giving some of the things I can't take home to my friends that are staying.
𝕒𝕟𝕟𝕒𝕓𝕖𝕝

March.

So now i'm all settled into my new home and absolutely love my little flat. I can't believe i've already been here for a month and a half, it's just flying by.

So one of the first events I went to in March was a toga party, which was also kind of a paint party with UV paint. We donned our best bedsheets and gold glitter was absolutely everywhere.

TOGA!

As another event for our intentional orientation, Victoria University threw a boat party/cruise for us one evening. We all got dressed up and enjoyed the beautiful views onboard the Victoria Star whilst drinking a lot of alcohol and eating free pizza.

The Victoria Star

Around the end of my third week here myself and a few friends went to the Moomba Festival in Melbourne City. We spent the afternoon wandering round the different food stalls, game stalls and even went on a couple of the rides. As it started to get dark we went to find a spot by the river to sit and watch some of the waterskiing competitions that were taking place on the lake. Soon after, the firework display started.

Fireworks at Moomba

Every month I try make it easier on myself and keep a draft of my monthly post updated each time I do something, but I can sometimes be a bit useless at that. I'm now struggling to remember what i've done in the past week.

The Grand Prix! I've never really been a massive fan of this on the tv despite a lot of family members loving it, I just couldn't get into it. Like a lot of things though, it's so much different when you're there for real and I actually got a little excited. Unfortunately though that night I came down with laryngitis and was knocked out for a few days! After being prescribed antibiotics I started to feel loads better, but it meant i'd have to take it easy with alcohol for a few days!

#AUSGP!

Here we go again with another night out. This wasn't for anything special, I just really like this picture!

I am a giant.

I'm not really a massive sports person, but when Uni offers you free tickets to an AFL game, you don't refuse. Our friend Tarrena supports one of the teams playing; the Freemantle Dockers, and as me Priya and Louisa aren't from Australia, we weren't really fussed with who we supported, so we chose to support Tarrena's. We all bought scarves and started to get a little excited. In the end we really enjoyed ourselves and I started to really get into the game. Unfortunately though, the Western Bulldogs won 103-38. But it was still a great day out doing something I wouldn't usually do.

Go Freo!

Everyone knows, Jurassic Park is my all time favourite film. I just loved dinosaurs when I was younger. Coincidentally, there was a Jurassic Park exhibition in Melbourne and of course I went. It was themed as if you were actually going to the island and all the little kids were getting so excited it was adorable. There were animatronics of all the popular dinosaurs and they looked so real!

Ah!

As this post goes up i'll be spending my Spring Break in Sydney! Which will be in a new post very soon. I can't believe it's April already!!!
𝕒𝕟𝕟𝕒𝕓𝕖𝕝

Onwards & upwards.

I'm not going to be blogging here every single day, but a lot of people have asked me to keep them updated with what i'm getting up to and this is probably the easiest (and cheapest) way to do that.
After my mini meltdown yesterday, there wasn't really a way for anything to get worse.
(I lie, I could've lost my luggage and money and basically had nothing). So when I woke up on my second day I had a bit of a more positive outlook on my time here. I'm missing my family a hell of a lot, and after a few phone calls with each of them this morning (last night for them), I got myself up and dressed and went outside. It was a bit overcast yesterday, so when I went out on today to see blue sky and sunshine, it automatically made me feel a lot better. It still feels bizarre than i'm wandering around in shorts and sunglasses in February, however.
I've still to visit the Vodafone shop again as my mobile data isn't working, which is why I need to keep going to University to use their WIFI. I still need to buy a WIFI router for my room, and pillows. Last night I used a pillowcase stuffed with my clothes. I also need to figure out how to work the air con in my room. Last night it came on at 3am and as I only have a bedsheets (they don't really have duvet's here) I was bloody freezing, so I need a blanket. I also need to call Halifax to transfer my money here which is a complete and total pain in the arse. You know the FRIENDS episode where Chandler listens to a tape during the night to help him stop smoking? "You are a strong independent woman...", I keep replaying that to myself in my head.

My new University!

Tonight i'm meeting up with a couple of girls from my University back in Leeds, and I can't wait to have a real conversation with someone and have someone to socialise with.
Tomorrow a girl i've been chatting with on Facebook from France is moving into my building, so that's another opportunity to meet someone else. Then on Tuesday I have my orientation.
I just feel like after a rather depressing post yesterday, I needed to let everyone know back home that i'm doing okay now. The homesickness is still here, but I suppose that will fade with time.
I'm starting to feel like i'm a mix between Samwise Gamgee and Bilbo Baggins.

Why be in piss-wet through freezing Leeds when you can be in sunny, beautiful Melbourne?
I'm starting to get excited again about all of the opportunities I will have here. Once i'm in my new room next week and i've unpacked properly I feel like everything will start to fall into place.
𝕒𝕟𝕟𝕒𝕓𝕖𝕝

Rambling Post #7: My brain is on overdrive.

It's exactly 2 weeks today that I pack up and leave everyone and everything to go live at the other side of the world and do what is probably the scariest and most daring thing I have ever done in my 21 years. In the past week, it has slowly started to dawn on me that this is actually happening. Before the new year it was just something that will eventually happen to me next year, and it felt like it was ages away. But 2016 is already flying by and in 14 days I will be calling another country home.

I used to hate going to town by myself or sitting alone in a public place (which incidentally is what i'm doing now). So to go from being such a socially awkward, shy and comfort-zone friendly teenager to an actual proper grown up adult moving to a different continent by herself I think shows how much i've changed in the past few years.

So as it crept into February, anxiety started to creep in. I don't really suffer from anxiety, don't get me wrong there are a lot of things that make me feel nervous and unsure but the only thing that really gives me panic attacks are confined spaces (yay for a 22 hour flight). As a result, a million questions keep whizzing through my mind.

What if I don't make friends? What if there's a spider in my loo and I don't know how to get rid of it? What if I get the wrong flight and end up in Zimbabwe? What if I miss everyone so much I don't enjoy myself? What if the Australians think my accent is weird? What if the Australians just think i'm weird? What if they don't let me in the country because there's a slight bit of mud on my shoes? What if I get eaten by a Kangaroo? What if I don't get the hang of cooking and die of starvation? What if the people that live in my building are weird?

And every time I just need to stop myself and think;

What if I meet the most amazing friends? What if I don't encounter any deadly creatures? (Unlikely) What if I come back with a tan? What if I have the most amazing time and absolutely love the whole thing?

I think the main thing I need to keep telling myself is yeah, it's probably going to be upsetting at first and you're going to miss everyone. But then you'll settle in and you'll make friends and you'll go on days to the beach and you'll experience new things and you'll be enjoying this new culture so much that before you know it June will be over and you'll be back in the miserable weather of Britain.

As usual with these rambling posts, there's not really anything people reading it can take from it, I just like to vent sometimes and this is the best way I know how!
𝕒𝕟𝕟𝕒𝕓𝕖𝕝

Rambling Post #6: I'm actually terrified.

Recently whenever people have been asking me about moving to Australia they usually ask "how excited are you?!", and don't get me wrong, I really can't wait to go, but i'm also absolutely terrified.

I've never lived away from home before so going from my comfort zone in Leeds with all of my family and friends around me, to the other side of the world where I know absolutely no one makes me a little anxious. Knowing that I won't have my parents as a safety net whilst i'm out there is probably what scares me the most. But that's life. I've got to leave them at some point. I think i'm not that good at making friends, it always just happens by a happy accident. I'm not the kind of person to put myself out there in a new group of people and i'm actually pretty quiet when i'm getting to know people. It's only when i'm comfortable with someone that you start to realise i'm actually quite loud and never shut up.

Then there's the snakes. And spiders. And crocodiles. I've been watching I'm A Celebrity this year and every time I see one of the huge spiders it just reminds me that they're probably just a typical 'house spider' over there. I can deal with the usual British 50p sized spideys but hell naw to the spiders down under. I think the first things I will buy when I get there is a fly swat and a shit load of bug spray.

I feel like i've lived in my comfort zone for 21 years now and it's about time I did something that scares me, because staying in my comfort zone isn't going to get me anywhere.

But yeah, growing up and doing scary things sucks, but moving 10,053 miles away is also hella exciting.

𝕒𝕟𝕟𝕒𝕓𝕖𝕝